“People would tell me growing up how lucky I am to have them as a parent, but had no idea the abusive narcissist they were. I grew up in so much fear and confusion. In that level of narcissism, it’s so hard to recall memories in first person. As I got older I started to hate myself so much. I felt like there was something wrong with me, like my brain was wired wrong. I remember driving one day and wanted to be done. I took off my seatbelt and floored it. Closed my eyes, ready to fly into the windshield. Then a semi came and laid on his horn, made me swerve. I tried again, and a SECOND semi came and did the same thing. I was SO mad at god for not letting me die. It was then that I knew I had a bigger purpose. .
I started Vulnerable Heroes. An org that creates spaces for men to take their masks off and truly receive love and allow themselves to become vulnerable. Masculinity has lost its courage. Today fear based people shut down that need and go through the pain anyways. I take my mask off first and help them to be able to take theirs off too.” - Lucas
Lucas is a 37 yr old married father of 3. An attempt survivor, survivor of parental abuse, published author, TED speaker and podcast host. During Lucas’s session, I so badly wished the child in ME could have met the child in HIM. People who are raised with abusive narcissistic parents, share a strength. We each have a tiny version of ourselves inside, who saved us during those terrible moments. That’s what trauma is. That young child can’t comprehend that level of pain, so we create a space for it to live, so that we can survive. There is a fire inside us that helped us as we compartmentalized the pain and abuse. Lucas didn’t just survive it. He SLAYED it. His TEDx talk had me in tears. The level of bravery=astounding. As I watched it, I had a vision of my younger self in tears, clapping and cheering for him, as he slayed his dragons. He is inspiring us to expose our demons, to talk about the pain and hurt, and to shed light on that darkness. AND is helping other men, at a time when societies masculinity issues are MASSIVELY TOXIC.
THANK YOU Lucas for being a Face. We sit with you in your brave story today