"A friend of mine tells me one of the biggest problems that plagues our society is fatherlessness…
I did not realize how the scarcity of my father in my life affected me so, because not me, I didn't have daddy issues because I knew my dad, I remember thinking that as a kid. You know, you hear the phrase thrown around at school or on TV "yeah, she's got daddy issues."some now either very encouraged or very annoyed man will say. Thats what was said about the girl who is a little more than filled out than her gal pals, but it was dangerous when paired with the new interest in boys. That's what was said about the non trusting or bullshit taking girl who somehow always still had her heartbroken in the cafeteria, that's what was said about the girl who liked sex. But that was not me, I liked boys but they didn't like me and I kept my legs closed until seventeen so I couldn't have daddy issues not me, I knew my dad. He was my dad! He wasn't a deadbeat or in jail. He lived in a big beautiful house in Marietta, always drove a Mercedes and I saw him once or twice a year. Every other Christmas, sometimes Thanksgiving and every summer. Not me, no daddy issues here because I love my dad. He sends me to camp for a week or two in the summer and there is always Six Flags or White Water with my siblings. Not my dad...because he knows best. He sends the monthly checks on time. He is a minister and I trust him and I just wanna be here in his life...things are cleaner, I have to squint less to find beauty, people are happy, there is space, the school, the church, the' yes darling' phone calls to my step mom..
I wanted for so long to belong in my father's upper middle class world. I ached for it. I ached for my father. I think I still do because I've been searching for that feeling in the dumbest places. I wanted to belong in that world, but I could tell I didn't. I didn't quite belong to the one back at home either, which was not horrible but still haunted with my father's absence..."
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